.

Truth can be an enlightenment. Truth can be a bitter pill. I just had the bitter taste on my tongue. Literally. I tried to swallow the pill but it got stuck in my throat. And remained stuck. Now bitterness engulfed my senses. I tried to hold back but I was losing it. I puked. And continued heaving my guts out. I tried to draw in a breath but couldn’t. Was this the end? Why couldn’t I breath? Fumbling with my cellphone, I dialled an emergency number to get help.

I tried to open my eyes but light hit me hard. The world went white. I puked again and collapsed. A phone rang somewhere and I was jolted to reality with a fresh bout of nausea. I was in a hospital bed.My God! How did I end up here? I was a physician, caregiver. When did lines blur?

But they did. I thought of myself as a compassionate doctor with just enough skills and enthusiasm, and a little more. I was not naive. I understood my patients. Lying on that cold hospital bed , the pristine white sheets mocked me. How often had I stood beside these beds playing God? Telling people gripped with terror it was a place of comfort? I looked at the ceiling. Who was I? A physician? A patient? Or just an infinite void? Truth kept eluding me, teasing me at the edges of my sanity. I kept looking at the ceiling. The lines were getting blurred. Fast.

My beliefs were crumbling before me. I was a mere human in front of the immense courage shown by those who sought help from me. I had some knowledge and a little skill. How could I pretend to be larger than my fellow humans facing terrible trials of fate?

The enlightenment brought tears. They kept coming as I saw the misery surrounding me and the indomitable human spirit which refused to submit. I was a small piece of the picture, a part of that fight. It was better once all lines blurred.It brought out everything hidden in shadows and filled all gaps. I could now see the picture which had no boundaries. Just our souls’ energy. driving us towards a place of compassion,beauty and beyond.